[Nona comes and finds Lacus a few hours after all the issues with the body have been sorted out. She's a little glum. Not as devastated as she thinks she should be but she's... sad.
Lacus seemed worse.
With her arms behind her back, Nona cocks her head and speaks evenly in a voice that wasn't designed for offering condolences.]
Are you in grief? Do you need a hug? Do you need Noodle?
[ For a moment, Lacus doesn't know how to reply. There's a lot of people here who aren't as shocked about Merlin's passing as they should be (Lacus counts herself among them, having shed no tears), but this is...
It's odd, because everything about it seems wrong and discordant but that is exactly what makes it read as genuine. Why would someone bother pretending, if they were this terrible at it?
Having settled on this assessment of the situation, Lacus can relax. ]
[ They're the same way, but sometimes Nona feels very child-like. Lacus thinks back to the kids she took care of back on Earth, scarred by the war and not always sure how to adjust to life after.
She smiles softly. ]
I'm sad but I'm going to be okay. How are you feeling? Maybe a hug would be nice for both of us.
I don't think I'm as upset as I'm supposed to be. I expected the killing to start. I hope it doesn't last too long...
[She wraps her tiny arms around Lacus, her friend, and squeezes her with them. She knows how to hug. She's been hugging Camilla all her life. It's one of the skills she's most proud of developing.
She's used to people looking at her and seeing a child. She doesn't mind so much, most of the time.]
I hope you don't die, Lacus. I love you and would be really upset.
[ Lacus squeezes Nona tightly in return. Hugging is comforting, she finds. She can't let go and allow herself to be truly vulnerable, but it's still good. It's good to feel they're both alive. ]
I have a place to go back to... I'm not allowing myself to die here.
[ She'll believe that until she can't anymore, there's no benefit to doubting herself now. ]
I don't get hurt like most people. [She says with absolute certainty.] But I'll try my best anyway.
[It's her job to take care of the class if nobody else is around to do it and while Lacus might be the same age as her and from an entirely different planet and not enrolled in her school, she thinks the principle is the same.
She can tell that Lacus isn't allowing herself full vulnerability. That's fine. At least she knows she's helping.]
[ That's a hummed affirmative, before she figures out how to best explain this in actual words. ]
There are responsibilities I have to fill in my world, so that is one thing... But 'home' is a person to me. Long ago he promised me that he would return to my side, and he's lived through countless difficulties since to keep his promise.
I will likewise always return to him - it's a promise too sacred to break.
[ The exact nature of the bond she shares with Kira is difficult for outsiders to grasp and even Lacus herself struggles for actual verbalization of it. ]
[She thinks she understands. Palamedes and Camilla... they have a kind of love that neither has ever attempted to explain to her, but she's sure that it's the same kind. When Palamedes had her kiss Camilla's hand and say it was from him, it was the first time she'd seen Camilla's cool demeanor slip.
She knows that Palamedes died, and only returned because he really wanted to see her again.
She nods, understanding to the degree that she understands anything.] You love him. [She doesn't actually mean this in a strictly romantic sense.]
Promises are important. Breaking a promise means you get fired from Hot Sauce's gang back home, so I understand.
[ Lacus is not going to argue that description. She does love Kira, and she owes him everything. Their connection can't be severed anymore, and even despite all the guilt she feels towards him, this gives her comfort. ]
... that's a cute nickname.
[ Before addressing anything else, she's giving her approval there. ]
I want you to get home to your friends [ gang? ] at home as well. Do you have an idea of how we would help each other with this?
[Yes, a nickname. That's definitely what that was.]
...I'm not sure yet.
I don't think we can swim. I can't fly a spaceship. Maybe Raptor knows. [Not Ho-oh apparently, she's decided Raptor is more trustworthy.] But he won't tell us. At least not yet.
But no matter what happens I'm going to keep trying.
If we had a spaceship available, I would be capable of giving instructions as to how to man each position on the bridge.
[ They don't have one and Lacus doesn't foresee the possibility, but... it'd work, if so. It'd be kind of nice, even. ]
Rapt0r is quite forward as a person. Talking to him is interesting - I don't believe he's consciously trying to lead us astray at least. Have you also chatted with him?
Mostly about Pokemon. He doesn't like nice things, I think he's probably pretty fragile and is cruel as a result of that. But I like him. It's harder to understand him when I can't see him.
[Oh, that reminds her. She takes a drawing she drew early in the week out of her bag and shakes it before presenting it to Lacus.]
I did draw a Raptor, though. [It's a photorealistic drawing of a raptor, with detail and shading that a professional artist couldn't hope to match. She's never seen a Raptor before in her life.] I thought maybe it would help me understand but it didn't.
[ That is... Lacus is not sure what this is, because 'impressive' doesn't seem to cut it. Lacus has to take a moment to look at it up close and admire the the work. Coordinators are designed to be more skilled than normal humans, but even in Coordinator society art skill on this levels would be considered very rare. ]
My... you're amazingly skilled at drawing!
[ That also feels like the understatement of the century. ]
I wonder why he chose the raptor as his namesake... Though I imagine it was because they were such deadly creatures? He seems to pride himself on his destructiveness.
[Nona and her dog Noodle are sitting on the beach, cross-legged and staring out into the ocean. Noodle rests it's head on Nona's lap while Nona scritches his ears and pets him solemnly.
Thinking isn't one of Nona's strong suits, that's Palamedes. Nona is the one that's not good at anything. The one that everyone has to take care of.
She thinks about how Sonya's meat smelled as it sizzled and burned. She's not sure what to feel. It was just meat. It always smells the same. Terrible and disgusting.
But she's not alone.]
Little Lake. Have you come to see the king of all dogs?
[She means Noodle. But her tone is quiet and introspective.]
[ Yikes. Lacus has seen her share of violence and death, but it was actually her first time seeing someone burn upclose. Nona's life circumstances start seeking more and more mysterious.
At this point she isn't even sure if the king of all dogs think is a funny game or genuinely meaningful... ]
I'll keep quiet! And so will Mr. Pink, right?
[ To this, Haro jumps up and down twice, flaps his eats and goes 'No problem! I'm feeling fine!' which is as good as confirmation, probably. ]
If people knew Noodle was the king of all dogs, there would be anarchy and potentially rebellion. Noodle can only do so much, but dogs like to complain about funny things.
[She pets Noodle idly.]
Also, secret king of all dogs is actually the full title, and if you say a secret it's no longer a secret. So far it's just you, me, Camilla, Palamedes, Pyrrha, Hot Sauce, Honesty, Beautiful Ruby, Born in the Morning and Kevin that know about Noodle's secret title.
[She gets the feeling she's being humored but she chatters away about it anyway, stroking Noodle's fur. It helps keep her mind off of the smell of Sonya's meat as he died.]
[ This raises so many more questions than it answers... and yet it's elaborate enough to make one very curious. Nona is not the only one getting pleasantly distracted from the whole death and dying thing here. ]
I'm honored to be included in the group. Your faith is not going to be misplaced.
[ And this is true, she is honored. Whether or not the dog thing will ever make sense to her. ]
So... do the dogs know he's their king and it's humans who aren't allowed to know? Or is he in hiding from the dogs as well?
I don't know who I am. I don't remember. [They can't forget.] Nona was my first word.
Well, actually my first words were "No" and "No" but it turned into Nona later. Strangers don't know that, they assume I'm Nona because that's what I was born as. I don't know what I was born as, but I know these eyes aren't mine. [She looks away from the ocean and blinks at Lacus, her eyes shining brightly despite the glum tone of her voice.]
[ Lacus can't say she understands exactly what it is that created Nona, but she can think of people who this reminds her of. People who share the faces of someone else, or even the genetic make-up of someone else, trapped between being who they are and the looming specter of another being.
And then a man who lost his memories, who went by a different name entirely... Mu got his memories back eventually. Would 'Nona'? That's a question only the future can answer.
For now, it isn't that important. ]
You're you. Regardless of who you look like, regardless of what you remember... Who you are now, what you feel and think... That's precious.
I don't think I've ever met somebody who spoke the word 'love' so easily.
[ Judging by her smile, she does not think this is a bad thing at all. There is no reason to doubt Nona's declarations - there are people here who feel full of deceit, but Nona is not among them. ]
[Nona comes and finds Lacus come monday, after having avoided her all of Sunday, she thinks she's worked up the courage to fulfill her promise. She finds her by the scent of her hair and the warmth of her blood.
In the arcade, when nobody else is around, and Nona sits next to her in the Mario Kart machine, sitting in an L squat.]
[ Lacus was not in much of a state to talk to anybody on Sunday, not having slept and having eaten very little. On Monday, she's better - good enough to pretend that she got more rest than just a few hours, good enough to have had breakfast and face the day.
So maybe it's for the best that Nona only appear to her now when she can smile at her with warm ease as she puts the game on pause. ]
I'll be happy to listen to all that you feel ready to let me know.
[Of course, Nona can tell. She can always tell, by the subtle shift in her posture, the ways her eyelids are weighted with exhaustion. And the way her heart beats, and her bones shift.
Lacus is an open book to her. But she thinks that the exhaustion and emotional wounds are secrets that Lacus doesn't want to acknowledge.]
Before I tell you... you have to promise to stay alive.
You see, the only person here I've told was Vergilius and he died very soon after, so I'll be very cross and upset with you if you follow in his footsteps.
And you also have to promise not to tell everyone... I don't think even Rapt0r or Ho-Oh know.
[ Only Vergilius, huh... Lacus understands more and more why the last trial was uniquely awful for the both of them, and why they couldn't have been there for each other for the duration of it. ]
I won't - I won't tell anyone, and I won't die here. Whatever happens, I'll be trying my hardest to survive and go home at the end of this. I promise it. That won't ever change.
[ She's got less power than a lot of people here. When it comes to mere physical comparison, Lacus knows she would be an easy target. And even so, accepting her death is in itself unacceptable. She has to live. ]
[The words are slow to move out of her throat, she doesn't know how to say it.
It should be easier now that she's said it once, right? She needs to tell everyone, including the people at Dodo House. She couldn't tell Palamedes and Pyrrha and Camilla and now she never will because she knows she'll never see them again.
[ That is certainly the option that crossed Lacus' mind first. The most simple, most straight-forward reason one would fear to not see their loved ones again. But everything here is so strange, all these worlds have such oddities in them that the easiest option had seemed far-fetched.
[Having said it, even for the second time, actually is a relief. And despite the bleak subject matter, she smiles, and seems deeply relieved. She's almost at peace.]
I don't know exactly. I'm sure Palamedes would have a Necromancer way of saying it, but he never knew.
This body isn't mine, you see. It's... rejecting me.
I've been dying for months. When I arrived I thought I maybe had a few more months. Now, I think I've got a week. Maybe two weeks.
[ Lacus can't say this makes any sense in the logic of her world, but intuitively, she understands how this could happen. How a body would reject a foreign presence, a soul it wasn't made for or shaped by.
'These eyes aren't mine,' Nona had said and she'd meant more than amnesia. Nona isn't like Mu la Flaga who has been brainwashed to be Neo Roanoke. She's something else entirely, smiling at her with a stranger's face.
It's an awkward angle, sitting the way they are, but Lacus bends over so she can pull Nona into a hug. ]
Nona... Is there nothing anybody can do? Not even the necromancers?
[Nona takes the hug, wrapping her arms around Lacus and squeezing gently. She smiles against her shoulder. It's not her face, not her lips, not her muscles, but it is her smile.
Whoever the body belonged to, she intuitively understands that they never smiled all that much. It's a shame. They must have been so beautiful. They were, after all, her first and only kiss, at those rare moments in which she was overpowered by feeling and leaned in to her reflection to kiss it.]
...No. There's nothing. Definitely not from here.
But it's okay, really. I'm okay with dying. I've had six whole months of being me, with a wonderful life and wonderful friends who love me, and I got to love, and pet Noodle, and feel the ocean on me. And I got to be your friend too.
I'm the luckiest girl in the world. It would be greedy to ask for more.
[ Six months. Suddenly it makes perfect sense that Nona had always seemed so young to Lacus despite being the exact same age. Six months. It's far too short.
Lacus' arms tighten around Nona, as if holding her could pass more life to her and keep her here. ]
I don't think it would be greedy. I think being Nona is a most wonderful thing for you to be and there would be nothing wrong at all with wanting more of it.
[ Nona deserves more life than this. Even if it's better for her to be at peace with the length of her existence, even if it's good that Nona is happy... Lacus at least wants her to know that she's allowed to wish for more, because she matters. ]
I'd like a lot more of it. So... let's make sure the rest of your weeks will make you even lucker, alright?
[She smiles, nuzzling her face into Lacus' shoulder. She can hear, from the beating of her heart, from the intensity of her breath, that she means it. And she can feel the grief. Hear it.
Nona's had a while to process death. She's been dying for half her life, after-all. But she thinks she can remember what it felt like when she realized she was living on borrowed time.]
...My friends love the person who this body belongs to. They love the person who my eyes belong to.
It's not fair for me to take them away.
But I do wish I could spend more time with you. And Crea, and The Lord of The Flies, and Xiao. And everyone else. And I wish I could see my... family... again.
[ Weighing love against love is an impossible task. The body's owner is loved, but so is Nona - for Lacus, who's only ever met Nona, it's unthinkable to say that Nona is worth less than this other person just because she came second. Nona is Nona, and she has a bright smile and an optimistic attitude and Lacus loves her earnestness.
It's not fair to take Nona away either.
But that lament won't make her feel any better. ]
We'll carry you with us. Long after you're gone, I'm going to look at dresses and imagine you wearing them. I'm going to carry you in my heart to show you all the sights I love and I'll introduce you to all my friends. I'll tell you about them until they can feel you like you're right there.
Some of my time will become your time. I'm sure it's the same for Crea and Beel and Xiao - there's a bit of Nona that will never leave us.
[You are ten years old, approximately. Your body is scrawny, your skin is a sickly brown and your eyes are a dull grey. You live every waking moment knowing that you are the result of an atrocity. You are a war crime. The complete genocide of the Ninth House and all children below the age of eighteen. The halls of the house echo with empty grief as the elders all spend the rest of their life mourning what your parents told them was an accident. All except for one girl, barely older than you, who hates you more than anything in the world.
You have spent your entire young life looking for a reason to live. You are far too expensive to die.
The Ninth House was created for one purpose. The tomb. The locked tomb of Castle Dreaburh, that which guards the Emperor's death, that which must never be opened, the rock that you pray will never be rolled away.
You are going to open it. You have spent the last few years breaking every single lock, with only one remaining, and you are going to open it, and if what is in there is not worth it, you are going to lock the door behind you.
There is someone behind you, however. And they know what you're up to. Fortunately, she hates you. She's the only other kid left alive, after all.]
Nonagesimus. [She calls out, and you can tell that she's delighted at the prospect of getting you in trouble.] Were you thinking of opening the tomb?
[Distantly, you'll be able to hear someone's voice through the harsh Ninth winds as you turn and face the only potential target of your rage.
[ Lacus is Lacus and yet she isn't. There are feelings and motivations inside of her that are foreign, based on memories she has no real access to. She responds to a name that isn't hers, except right now it is and turns to face a perfect stranger who isn't strange to her now.
And there's another voice, something else entirely, and Lacus-as-Lacus wishes she could listen more closely. ]
[The girl looms over you, snapping her fingers in front of your face. She's lanky and tall, and red-headed (terrible!), and her eyes are no doubt familiar to Lacus.
Golden gleaming eyes like tiny stars, unnatural and beautiful. Lipochrome.]
Did you go deaf or something? I guess if you're walking in through there, you've probably gone mad too.
[The tomb calls. The voice calls from inside.
'You held the sword aloft... Who held the sword? What was his name? Lacus...']
[ "Why don't you go back to digging for your dead mum's bones and leave me to my business, Nav. This doesn't concern the likes of you." That's what an impulse inside her says, because she's not Lacus Clyne now. Not really. Just enough Lacus Clyne to phrase it a little differently. ]
That isn't any concern of yours. Leave me be, Nav. There's something I need to do here.
[ Because that something is speaking to her. It's in her head and she wants to listen. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
WEEK 0, SATURDAY EVENING
Lacus seemed worse.
With her arms behind her back, Nona cocks her head and speaks evenly in a voice that wasn't designed for offering condolences.]
Are you in grief? Do you need a hug? Do you need Noodle?
1/2
It's odd, because everything about it seems wrong and discordant but that is exactly what makes it read as genuine. Why would someone bother pretending, if they were this terrible at it?
Having settled on this assessment of the situation, Lacus can relax. ]
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She smiles softly. ]
I'm sad but I'm going to be okay. How are you feeling? Maybe a hug would be nice for both of us.
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[She wraps her tiny arms around Lacus, her friend, and squeezes her with them. She knows how to hug. She's been hugging Camilla all her life. It's one of the skills she's most proud of developing.
She's used to people looking at her and seeing a child. She doesn't mind so much, most of the time.]
I hope you don't die, Lacus. I love you and would be really upset.
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I have a place to go back to... I'm not allowing myself to die here.
[ She'll believe that until she can't anymore, there's no benefit to doubting herself now. ]
You take care, too. I don't want to see you hurt.
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[It's her job to take care of the class if nobody else is around to do it and while Lacus might be the same age as her and from an entirely different planet and not enrolled in her school, she thinks the principle is the same.
She can tell that Lacus isn't allowing herself full vulnerability. That's fine. At least she knows she's helping.]
Where do you need to go back to? Home?
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[ That's a hummed affirmative, before she figures out how to best explain this in actual words. ]
There are responsibilities I have to fill in my world, so that is one thing... But 'home' is a person to me. Long ago he promised me that he would return to my side, and he's lived through countless difficulties since to keep his promise.
I will likewise always return to him - it's a promise too sacred to break.
[ The exact nature of the bond she shares with Kira is difficult for outsiders to grasp and even Lacus herself struggles for actual verbalization of it. ]
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She knows that Palamedes died, and only returned because he really wanted to see her again.
She nods, understanding to the degree that she understands anything.] You love him. [She doesn't actually mean this in a strictly romantic sense.]
Promises are important. Breaking a promise means you get fired from Hot Sauce's gang back home, so I understand.
In fact, I promise to help you, Little Lake.
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... that's a cute nickname.
[ Before addressing anything else, she's giving her approval there. ]
I want you to get home to your friends [ gang? ] at home as well. Do you have an idea of how we would help each other with this?
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...I'm not sure yet.
I don't think we can swim. I can't fly a spaceship. Maybe Raptor knows. [Not Ho-oh apparently, she's decided Raptor is more trustworthy.] But he won't tell us. At least not yet.
But no matter what happens I'm going to keep trying.
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[ They don't have one and Lacus doesn't foresee the possibility, but... it'd work, if so. It'd be kind of nice, even. ]
Rapt0r is quite forward as a person. Talking to him is interesting - I don't believe he's consciously trying to lead us astray at least. Have you also chatted with him?
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[Oh, that reminds her. She takes a drawing she drew early in the week out of her bag and shakes it before presenting it to Lacus.]
I did draw a Raptor, though. [It's a photorealistic drawing of a raptor, with detail and shading that a professional artist couldn't hope to match. She's never seen a Raptor before in her life.] I thought maybe it would help me understand but it didn't.
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My... you're amazingly skilled at drawing!
[ That also feels like the understatement of the century. ]
I wonder why he chose the raptor as his namesake... Though I imagine it was because they were such deadly creatures? He seems to pride himself on his destructiveness.
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Thanks, I think I did a pretty good job. I think this is what a raptor looks like anyway.
[Moomin right along.]
Maybe he just likes velociraptors as well. They dine on flesh and blood.
Week 1, Post-Execution
Thinking isn't one of Nona's strong suits, that's Palamedes. Nona is the one that's not good at anything. The one that everyone has to take care of.
She thinks about how Sonya's meat smelled as it sizzled and burned. She's not sure what to feel. It was just meat. It always smells the same. Terrible and disgusting.
But she's not alone.]
Little Lake. Have you come to see the king of all dogs?
[She means Noodle. But her tone is quiet and introspective.]
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Him and you both, actually.
[ Mostly Nona, but the dog is a nice add-on. Lacus does love cute animals. ]
Are you alright? That was quite the gruesome sight, earlier.
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[She shrugs, like that's not an insanely unsettling thing to say.]
I think... at least Sonya chose it. It's better if you get to choose, I think.
[She blinks and then says suddenly.]
Oh, but you can't tell anyone that Noodle's the king of all dogs. It's a secret, okay?
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At this point she isn't even sure if the king of all dogs think is a funny game or genuinely meaningful... ]
I'll keep quiet! And so will Mr. Pink, right?
[ To this, Haro jumps up and down twice, flaps his eats and goes 'No problem! I'm feeling fine!' which is as good as confirmation, probably. ]
Why does he have to be incognito?
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[She pets Noodle idly.]
Also, secret king of all dogs is actually the full title, and if you say a secret it's no longer a secret. So far it's just you, me, Camilla, Palamedes, Pyrrha, Hot Sauce, Honesty, Beautiful Ruby, Born in the Morning and Kevin that know about Noodle's secret title.
[She gets the feeling she's being humored but she chatters away about it anyway, stroking Noodle's fur. It helps keep her mind off of the smell of Sonya's meat as he died.]
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I'm honored to be included in the group. Your faith is not going to be misplaced.
[ And this is true, she is honored. Whether or not the dog thing will ever make sense to her. ]
So... do the dogs know he's their king and it's humans who aren't allowed to know? Or is he in hiding from the dogs as well?
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Noodle's court of loyal followers know, and that's enough. It's like how only my friends know I'm Nona. It's a secret.
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Why's that, if you don't mind sharing? Names can be quite complicated and heavy things, I know.
[ "Lacus Clyne" certainly feels like a power that has developed its own gravitational field beyond her as a person. ]
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I don't know who I am. I don't remember. [They can't forget.] Nona was my first word.
Well, actually my first words were "No" and "No" but it turned into Nona later. Strangers don't know that, they assume I'm Nona because that's what I was born as. I don't know what I was born as, but I know these eyes aren't mine. [She looks away from the ocean and blinks at Lacus, her eyes shining brightly despite the glum tone of her voice.]
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And then a man who lost his memories, who went by a different name entirely... Mu got his memories back eventually. Would 'Nona'? That's a question only the future can answer.
For now, it isn't that important. ]
You're you. Regardless of who you look like, regardless of what you remember... Who you are now, what you feel and think... That's precious.
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I love being Nona. I want to be Nona forever.
Nona is Lacus' friend, and I love you, so I love being Nona for that too.
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[ Judging by her smile, she does not think this is a bad thing at all. There is no reason to doubt Nona's declarations - there are people here who feel full of deceit, but Nona is not among them. ]
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Everyone and everything deserves love. And also, I mean it, I promise.
Week 3, Monday
In the arcade, when nobody else is around, and Nona sits next to her in the Mario Kart machine, sitting in an L squat.]
I said I'd tell you.
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So maybe it's for the best that Nona only appear to her now when she can smile at her with warm ease as she puts the game on pause. ]
I'll be happy to listen to all that you feel ready to let me know.
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Lacus is an open book to her. But she thinks that the exhaustion and emotional wounds are secrets that Lacus doesn't want to acknowledge.]
Before I tell you... you have to promise to stay alive.
You see, the only person here I've told was Vergilius and he died very soon after, so I'll be very cross and upset with you if you follow in his footsteps.
And you also have to promise not to tell everyone... I don't think even Rapt0r or Ho-Oh know.
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I won't - I won't tell anyone, and I won't die here. Whatever happens, I'll be trying my hardest to survive and go home at the end of this. I promise it. That won't ever change.
[ She's got less power than a lot of people here. When it comes to mere physical comparison, Lacus knows she would be an easy target. And even so, accepting her death is in itself unacceptable. She has to live. ]
1/2
[The words are slow to move out of her throat, she doesn't know how to say it.
It should be easier now that she's said it once, right? She needs to tell everyone, including the people at Dodo House. She couldn't tell Palamedes and Pyrrha and Camilla and now she never will because she knows she'll never see them again.
She takes a deep breath...]
2/2
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And still... ]
... what of?
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I don't know exactly. I'm sure Palamedes would have a Necromancer way of saying it, but he never knew.
This body isn't mine, you see. It's... rejecting me.
I've been dying for months. When I arrived I thought I maybe had a few more months. Now, I think I've got a week. Maybe two weeks.
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'These eyes aren't mine,' Nona had said and she'd meant more than amnesia. Nona isn't like Mu la Flaga who has been brainwashed to be Neo Roanoke. She's something else entirely, smiling at her with a stranger's face.
It's an awkward angle, sitting the way they are, but Lacus bends over so she can pull Nona into a hug. ]
Nona... Is there nothing anybody can do? Not even the necromancers?
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Whoever the body belonged to, she intuitively understands that they never smiled all that much. It's a shame. They must have been so beautiful. They were, after all, her first and only kiss, at those rare moments in which she was overpowered by feeling and leaned in to her reflection to kiss it.]
...No. There's nothing. Definitely not from here.
But it's okay, really. I'm okay with dying. I've had six whole months of being me, with a wonderful life and wonderful friends who love me, and I got to love, and pet Noodle, and feel the ocean on me. And I got to be your friend too.
I'm the luckiest girl in the world. It would be greedy to ask for more.
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Lacus' arms tighten around Nona, as if holding her could pass more life to her and keep her here. ]
I don't think it would be greedy. I think being Nona is a most wonderful thing for you to be and there would be nothing wrong at all with wanting more of it.
[ Nona deserves more life than this. Even if it's better for her to be at peace with the length of her existence, even if it's good that Nona is happy... Lacus at least wants her to know that she's allowed to wish for more, because she matters. ]
I'd like a lot more of it. So... let's make sure the rest of your weeks will make you even lucker, alright?
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Nona's had a while to process death. She's been dying for half her life, after-all. But she thinks she can remember what it felt like when she realized she was living on borrowed time.]
...My friends love the person who this body belongs to. They love the person who my eyes belong to.
It's not fair for me to take them away.
But I do wish I could spend more time with you. And Crea, and The Lord of The Flies, and Xiao. And everyone else. And I wish I could see my... family... again.
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It's not fair to take Nona away either.
But that lament won't make her feel any better. ]
We'll carry you with us. Long after you're gone, I'm going to look at dresses and imagine you wearing them. I'm going to carry you in my heart to show you all the sights I love and I'll introduce you to all my friends. I'll tell you about them until they can feel you like you're right there.
Some of my time will become your time. I'm sure it's the same for Crea and Beel and Xiao - there's a bit of Nona that will never leave us.
Week 5, Memshare
You have spent your entire young life looking for a reason to live. You are far too expensive to die.
The Ninth House was created for one purpose. The tomb. The locked tomb of Castle Dreaburh, that which guards the Emperor's death, that which must never be opened, the rock that you pray will never be rolled away.
You are going to open it. You have spent the last few years breaking every single lock, with only one remaining, and you are going to open it, and if what is in there is not worth it, you are going to lock the door behind you.
There is someone behind you, however. And they know what you're up to. Fortunately, she hates you. She's the only other kid left alive, after all.]
Nonagesimus. [She calls out, and you can tell that she's delighted at the prospect of getting you in trouble.] Were you thinking of opening the tomb?
[Distantly, you'll be able to hear someone's voice through the harsh Ninth winds as you turn and face the only potential target of your rage.
"I didn't want to remember this place."]
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And there's another voice, something else entirely, and Lacus-as-Lacus wishes she could listen more closely. ]
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Golden gleaming eyes like tiny stars, unnatural and beautiful. Lipochrome.]
Did you go deaf or something? I guess if you're walking in through there, you've probably gone mad too.
[The tomb calls. The voice calls from inside.
'You held the sword aloft... Who held the sword? What was his name? Lacus...']
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That isn't any concern of yours. Leave me be, Nav. There's something I need to do here.
[ Because that something is speaking to her. It's in her head and she wants to listen. ]